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Are you truly “with” human beings while you’re with them? Are you truly hearing, seeing,
feeling, sensing, respiration them in? Or are you often bored, distracted, rushed, or
wishing you were someplace else? Do you leap beforehand in the verbal exchange, pronouncing
what you already know they meant to mention or strategize “fixes” for his or her issues earlier than
they have got hardly left their lips? Do you locate yourself sizing up their clothing preference,
or facial quirks, or figit along with your pen or take in the interest in the room at the same time as they
are talking? No matter who i am with, i’m regularly dreamily misplaced in concept: “if most effective they… Speak
up, close up, be short, be reasonable, or be honest. I spend lots of time “wishing”
who i suppose the opposite character must be and what i need them to say – or not, and
best a small a part of my mind or heart is clearly with them in the now. Certain, we’ve all
been accused of not being “with it” as they are saying; but often it has become a totally bad
habit. Our lack of presence speaks volumes. Is your “half-heartedness” showing? While someone is getting most effective a part of our attention, it sends a clear message
that they don’t be counted terribly a whole lot. As a end result, relationships subtly suffer and so
does productivity. Certain, we are able to “get by using with it”, we all do it. And but what price are
we paying to have 1/2 of our recognition half of manner round the arena ? Quite a few
incorrect information and misinterpretation takes location. Humans are pressured, harm, and
angry, lost. They experience insignificant. They have a tendency in the direction of uncooperativeness, half-
hearted paintings, absenteeism, fitness troubles, even undermining each other. Relationships are strained and synthetic or contentious. The loss to me for my part is
some thing i rarely keep in mind – lack of support, loss of intimacy, loss of integrity. Is it that we don’t cost every different sufficient to be attentive for just a minute, don’t’
realize the impact, or is it that we just don’t know how? Practice the presence
in his 1999 book practicing the presence of humans. Mike mason on the contrary,
encourages the reader to discover ways to be present in– and to– the “presence” of
other people. This entails being inclined to see others as they may be, for who they’re,
and be adequate with that. Basically, to practice the presence of others way paying
complete and close attention to the humans you are with. The unexpected factor is how
rewarding and liberating it can be – on each aspects. Whilst we are able to be present, we are warmly focused. We find ourselves
playing the other’s organisation, fascinated by their uniqueness, intrigued by means of their
mystery, and a minimum of — or nice — at peace with them. Working towards the
presence of humans is an consciousness, yes, however maximum of all, it is a choice and eventually, an
artwork. As with all artwork or creative expression, the premise for tremendous outcomes is practice,
exercise, practice! Love the one you’re with
to be “with” a person or present to someone is a preference, but it’s far a committed preference
some may call a dedication. Could it’s, that giving a person our complete interest
is the essence of real love? Attentiveness is a listening with the heart and soul. It’s miles
now not some thing you give once in a while, it’s far a consistent manner of being with different
humans via thick and thin. There are steps to be found out, problems to be
overcome, insights to be carried out, blessings to be loved. All of this involves
devotion and endurance. Mason compares the experience of being gift to
other human beings to a contemplative way of praying.
Why? Returned in the 1600’s, a monk
named brother lawrence aptly coined the phrase “practicing the presence of god.”
brother lawrence found out the secret to being aware of and taking within the fact of
“god with us.” this led to his potential to be ever linked to this divine presence
with an added bonus that modified his lifestyles- contentment in the entirety. Whilst we connect with the presence of another, we’re “engaged”. We’re content to
‘love the only we’re with” and now not wsh we were some place else. In engagement, we move from being spectators to being contributors. In this position,
we are no longer intimidated or judgmental, nevermind distracted. We are absolutely
conscious however now not relaxation-much less. We’re in a kingdom of active rest. So, away with pre-occupation, away with busyness, business as standard, time-
focus, driven-ness, questioning beforehand, fixing, solving, sweating the
pain of others. Permit’s practice being completely centered, absolutely present to the subsequent
character we converse with. It’s a awarenes it is choice. It’s an art. It’s far love. Worthwhile conversations no longer best make experience, they make cents. “presence” is the
excellent sort of gift!
